hotel room ftw
In the future we'll all be gay
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
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