i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Can I color on your dick again?
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
