I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
he wants to bone in the snuggie
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize