Ambien. No doubt about it.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
