i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize