oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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