Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
