So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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