Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
