I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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