the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Randomize
