he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Randomize
