My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
