I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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