Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
You are a genius and a whore.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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