grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize