He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
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