Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
