i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
