Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Randomize