When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Randomize
