Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Randomize
