New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize
