Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
