My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
