the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
