He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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