I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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