My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
