So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
