Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
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