Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I met the friendliest cop last night
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Randomize
