just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
