how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
