Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
