the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
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