Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
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