whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
