But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I was not drunk enough for that final.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize