So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
