We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Randomize
