i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
