Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
Did you just see the Batmobile???
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
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