Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
it glows. i had to have it.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
