Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
