Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize