Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Randomize