just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
worst night to have a conscience
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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