yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize