Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
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